Hooray for Porn! (Edger Babble)

So, I didn't jack off yesterday and it feels like I haven't bated in a year! As soon as I got hard and felt my cock in my hand, it was like instant elation. God, I fucking love masturbating. And internet porn is the greatest thing to come along ever.
I don't know what I would do if suddenly I couldn't look at an endless stream of pics and vids of hot hard men and wet women. If I couldn't see them masturbate. If I couldn't watch guys and girls suck cock. If I couldn't see a guy swallow several guy's loads. If I couldn't watch guys and girls getting fucked in their beautiful assholes. If I couldn't watch guys jerk off on the bus, in the street, or on the beach. If I couldn't watch guys fill up an ass with cum. If I couldn't watch people eating a hot ass. If there were no pics of guys big bulges, no hot cyclist or swimmer pics, or no pics of guys fucking in parking decks.
What would I do if I couldn't watch a long amateur cumshot compilation? What if I couldn't look at pics of big beautiful cocks, any time I damn well please? No collections of hot asses to peruse? No videos of Jessie Colter grunting and moaning and saying "fuck yeah," over and over while he's getting fucked like a dog? Oh, I do love watching him get fucked!
What would I do if amateurs weren't uploading pics and videos of themselves masturbating and fucking by the thousands? What would I do if I couldn't put porn on my mp3 player and watch it while walking down the street or waiting for my laundry to dry and then bating in the laudromat bathroom with the door open? That used to be a favorite of mine.
I would be so sad if I suddenly couldn't watch videos of guys sucking themselves off.
My whole life would change if I couldn't see pics of guys fingering their asses, or army dudes showing their stuff, or some good hard face-fucking.
We bators of the 2010's are really privileged to live right now. If you had told me when I was a teenager that I would someday have this much access to this much porn, I would have probably cum in my pants right there.

Hooray for porn!!!